I'm writing one of the most difficult scenes I've ever written. I should be doing it right now, not lollygagging round here, but I need a mental break. And I feel sick. Actually sick.
I've upset myself before, usually by killing off characters I've got to like, but this is a whole other league. Such a tiny scene, too. Although big in its impact on my character, and the book too. And me. The things I've just had to research to write this were horrific. The way I am combining them is even worse. This is only going to be a few hundred words, but jeez. It's not sex, it's not violence, well not in any traditional sense - but it's awful. And it happens too, that's the worst thing, it's not fantasy or paranormal, it's reality.
I don't think I'm writing a horror story, but much more of this and I will be.
Ever disgusted yourself with your own writing?
*updated to add - finally finished and I think I'm going to be eating vegetarian for a few days now*