Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Princess Priceless

I have lectured both of my kids on the evils of the phrase 'talk to the hand'. Of all the things they can say to me, it is the one most likely to cause me to hit the roof. There's just something about the sheer insolence of it that causes an instant kaboom-flying-plates-and-unearthly-screaming reaction in me.

So the other day, as I remonstrated gently and utterly reasonably with Princess about some minor misdemeanour, she comes out with 'speak to the hand'. After I come down from the roof and start picking up the plates I realise she is gibbering repeatedly: 'but it's not rude, it's not rude, I said speak to the hand, not talk to the hand.'

Is it me or is it her?

14 comments:

Bevie said...

I'm out of touch. Until I saw it on Evil Editor's blog the other day I had never heard of it. And until you mentioned it I still didn't know what it meant. So I just now looked it up.

Whether one says, "speak", "talk", or "tell", it still seems rude to me. But sometimes that is entirely appropriate.

If Princess doesn't think her version is rude, she may not know what it means either. Does she?

Aniket said...

Oh, It is most definitely you.
Princess has got a point you know. You should have covered all the synonyms, knowing the geniuses in your kids.

In the case of Princess Priceless vs. the people the jury passes the verdict of NOT GUILTY! :D

fairyhedgehog said...

What is it about it that comes across as so rude? If you can explain that to her... Because it sound like she genuinely doesn't get it.

Robin S. said...

I llove that Princess. She'll make an excellent attorney one day! And God, I hope she's on my side when she does her closing arguments...

Precie said...

Ah, the fine semantic sensitivity of children! That is priceless.

Maybe provide her with a specific alternate phrase to use whenever she feels inclined to say "Speak to the hand"?

writtenwyrdd said...

I'm sure you have a very nice chat about language use versus gestures and what entails rudeness. But I am glad you could see that it was funny...after the fact.

McKoala said...

After the incident we had a nice long chat about all the different versions of the phrase and that they were all rude. Soccer boy and I stretched our vocabulary to give plenty of examples: 'chat to the hand' - still rude, 'tell the hand' - still rude, 'discuss it with the hand' - still rude. Etc. Took quite some time, but I think she got the message!

Chris Eldin said...

AHAHAHAH! My kids don't know that one. But I also hit the roof when they get flippant. Oh. Oh. Oh.
And more than that, I find that as the years go by, I'm becoming more and more like the white noise in our house. Just part of the background.
;-) Don't get me started. I just can't wait til they have children of their own...
hehehehe

Chris Eldin said...

LOL!!! I just read the comments! LOVE "Discuss with the hand!"
:-)

sylvia said...

You are totally right and I agree, it's a phrase that makes me see red. My son has used it exactly once. :)

JR's Thumbprints said...

I've been hearing that phrase in prison for years. I have a saying of my own, "Why don't you go back to your cell (room), get yourself a Q-tip, and dig the wax out of your ears." The inmates hate it.

Sarah Laurenson said...

Ah hahahahahaha

What a great side step there. But she does sound really clueless.

I once had a child do something I didn't like, can't remember what. I explained how that wasn't going to fly and asked him to promise me he wouldn't do it again. Turns out he didn't know what promise meant. Or that there was a need to emphasize or reiterate when saying you wouldn't do something. Once was enough in his world.

Stats for this past week:
Wrote 5 poems (during the week even): 469 words
Rewrote 1 chapter based on comments for my New Beginning on EE.
Slow writing weekend - had 2 going away parties (for the same person), spent too much time in the heat working on the sprinklers and did a major overhaul of the website I manage for SCBWI-LA.

blogless troll said...

That's hilarious. I've got a semantic side-stepper too, but she does it on purpose for laughs.

sex scenes at starbucks said...

I commence into lecturing and my son says, "Oh, dang. I stopped listening at about 'and another thing.'"