Wednesday, November 05, 2008

The Name Thieves

I'm sure you all know about the Baby Name Thieves. You know, the friends, old and new, who are pregnant around the same time as you and who, in the middle of discussions about stroller brands, stretch marks and Braxton Hicks contractions, steer the conversation around to baby names.

'Caspian-Romeo if it's a boy and Amaryllis-Francine if it's a girl,' you confide. 'How about you?'

'Oh, we haven't decided yet,' she says. Then when baby pops out around two weeks before yours (these people are always slightly more pregnant than you) and you get a flowery message announcing that their angel has landed, funnily enough the name is Caspian-Romeo or Amaryllis-Francine. And if ever taken to task, they will airily deny any memory of the name conversation and avow that Caspian-Romeo or Amaryllis-Francine has been their favourite name since they could lisp around the teat of their own baby bottle.

And you have to call your baby John.

It is now my painful task to announce to you that the Baby Name Thieves have cousins. The Novel Name Thieves.

It turns out that my perfectly wonderful first novel (yes, yes, the one in the bottom drawer, no need to remind me) shares its title with the name of a rock band. My second (yes, yes, it's still unsold, no update, again...) shares the name of a blogger. My third I think is as yet unstolen (perhaps because it is very long). The fourth, half finished novel, shares the name of a song. The fifth, well OK, the idea in my head that may or may not ever be written, but which already has a title with which I am very pleased, I discovered in the library today shares the name of...another novel.

Who are these evil people, the Novel Name Thieves? How do they find me? Is this an alien probe situation?


Whirlochre said...

Newly born babies called Cassius are very scary indeed. It's one of those names you have to grow into.

Worse than the title of your novel being thieved is plot. It's no fun having to shelve a rewrite of Anna Karenina.

JaneyV said...

My WIP has the same name as a newspaper. Unfortunately the paper had it first - does that make me one those heinous name thieves???????

Robin S. said...

That's the freaking pits. It really is.

I'm keeping my title hidden way, way under the covers (where else would it be, coming from me). But I love it. It took me a while to come up with it. It was my second title for my novel- and took an epiphany to come up with. Sooooooo....if someone cops it, or it's pre-copped, as it were, I'll be honestly very upset.

I'm sorry, McK. I really am. I know you're being a tad facetious, but still. El sucko, girl. I commiserate. I'd be drinking, if I were you.

Chumplet - Sandra Cormier said...

My first novel was named after a hit song. Not on purpose.

My second novel has its own name. I don't think anyone else has it.

My contracted third novel is safe... so far.

BTW my kids are named after a queen and one of her sons.

McKoala said...

Whirl, I'm sorry. All those years. Wasted.

'gasp' ssshhh...don't tell Janey your title!

Robin, I will never look under your covers...

Chumplet, thanks for coming by at such a difficult time. Hope all is going well. And, of course, it's nice to have confirmation via the names that your family is indeed royalty... The lost Canadian Royals?

ChrisEldin said...

It does suck. And ten years from now, it will such even more because even more titles will be gone.

*eyeing Whirlochre suspiciously* I was going to call my next novel "Cassius" or "Anna Karenina."

*eyeing Mckoala suspiciously* I was going to call my tenth book "The Name Thief."

*eyeing Robin suspiciously* Who told you about my thirtieth book, "The Hidden Way?"

Lunges at Janey, who clearly stole my title "WIP."

Chumplet is safe because she has pics of naked hockey players...

Sarah Laurenson said...

I don't know. I might look under Robin's cover. Just look, mind you.


It's a conspiracy, McK. Your computer is bugged so they always know the names of your books - published or not.

Robin S. said...

Sarah, you devil, you! Hee.

And I agree, our computers are talking to each other.

Ello said...

WEll I have this grade book title called McKoala Days, I don't think anyone else has one like it!

You know when I was pregnant Da Man tried to convince me to name the baby Maximus from Gladiator - whether it was a girl or boy. Now there's a name no one would have stolen!

Precie said...

1) Yeah, soon after I named my YA wip, a TV series debuted with the same name. But I think the TV series was short-lived.

2) I don't know if you got my msg, but I'm very sorry to say...I've instituted a new personal Facebook policy--no "friending" people I don't know "in real life." It's absolutely nothing personal. And it's resulted in some painful cuts, as some of our mutual blogfriends can attest.

ChrisEldin said...

Mck, are you facebooking? I really have to get with the times... Do you like it? I should go ask Precie if she likes it...but I'm assuming so.

sylvia said...

Hmmm, so I can't help guessing:

1. Smashing Pumpkins
2. Sex scenes at Starbucks
3. A Very Long and Unique Novel Name - How Novel!
4. The Chrome Plated Megaphone of Destiny
5. Thirty-six Reasons for Believing in Everlasting Punishment

Am I close?

Shona Snowden said...

Sorry, had to duck out for a few days to personally pummel Ello for her cheek.

Precie, it's fine! Glad to hear it wasn't only me, though...

Chris, I'm a Facebook amateur. Look me up - real name on there.

Sooo close Sylvia. Just so close.