Sadly the keyboard blood has more to do with work than fiction, and my brain is bare of blog inspiration, so I'm taking refuge in some of Princess's wonderful remarks, like:
"Mummy, was Sarah's mummy born fat?''
Princess's friend: "Do you know what a vagina is?"
Princess: "Yes. It's a willy."
Princess's friend: (pause) "I knew that."
"I don't think there should be jewellery shops. I think they should all be closed. Grown-ups have enough jewellery."
And here's a classic from Soccer Boy, only this morning:
"When our goldfish die, why don't we put them on the barbecue and eat them?"